Buying Time

With covid-19 running rampant I am "pausing" my treatments. Actually I am not having treatments right now, but really pausing moving forward to select treatments. I really do not have much choice.

My best options will in all likelihood be drug trials. But they are pretty much shut down right now. My first potential one fell through. Another one is completely on hold. I was going to speak with a doctor about it via FaceTime, in the hope that I can get some information about the study in order to "hang on" to see if it is worthwhile. But even that presents a problem - when they realized I am in a different state they may not even be allowed to speak to me just to give me a background.

I also need to be careful which treatment I choose now, since it could stop me from being qualified for a trial. Plus the thought of going out to a hospital for treatment seems to present a higher risk then sitting on my cancer for a couple of months. Despite best precautions, there is a chance I could still come down with covid-19. There are patients at MSK who have it.

If I get sick and things keep on going like they are, I would be the first one they will be taking off a ventilator and move on to the next patient.

I get it all. I understand it all. Why trials are shutting down. Why I would be removed from medical treatment. So with that in mind, I will sit and wait some more.